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Queer Adolescents of Color

March 29, 2023 in Educate Yourself, LINKS

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QPOC, an acronym standing for “queer people of color,” are minorities in several ways. Not only are they racial minorities, but they are also members of the LGBTQ+ community. This intersectionality – the ways that things like discrimination and disadvantages overlap if you belong to more than one marginalized group – can be difficult, especially during adolescence.

Not only are these adolescents figuring out where they belong in their community and how much they want to show of their race and culture (think of code-switching, for example), but they are also trying to figure out their sexuality. The way they view sexuality and queerness can also be affected by their culture’s views on the topic, which may make it harder for them to come to terms with. One recent example of this is the controversy associated with Kevin Hart and the Oscars: he lost the hosting job because of his homophobic tweets, and while Ellen DeGeneres, a white lesbian, interviewed him about the topic, black queer people responded about how the situation is much different for them.

Because the rates of mental illness in racial minorities, LGBTQ+ people, and adolescents are alarmingly high, it’s almost not surprising to see that that QPOC youth have a high risk of being diagnosed with a mental illness as well. Unfortunately, because of the issues that come with intersectionality, it can be even more difficult to access treatment for reasons such as the potential higher stigma against mental illness and therapy, and the process of deciding who they would feel comfortable coming out to. As a whole, QPOC are also at high risk for items such as substance abuse, trauma, suicidal intention, and poor relationships with adults, as well as the threat of rejection, discrimination, and violence.

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Fortunately, people are beginning to pay more attention to the needs of queer adolescents of color. Articles are discussing ways that clinicians from privileged spaces (i.e. white, cisgender, and straight) can keep their patients’ identities in mind and how to be mindful of a potentially drastic power dynamic, while others are giving attention to minority therapists and giving advice on how to find one. Groups and popular websites are creating spaces where queer youth of color can share their experiences and stories in order to let others know that they are not alone, as well as the forgotten histories of other QPOC. And of course, queer youths of color are making their voices known through social media.

Representation is also key in helping QPOC. Reports come out annually about how much minorities, such as women, POC, and LGBTQ+ people, are shown on TV shows and movies throughout that year. Most of these generally have an optimistic tone, but there doesn’t seem to be much reported about the overlap, such as lesbians of color. This is especially true for shows meant for tweens and teens, like the CW, where queer characters, especially women, are almost always white. Adolescents who identify as QPOC and watch shows that appeal to them are not likely to see themselves on screen, therefore making them feel even more invisible, as they may already have trouble fitting in with what is considered to be “normal” development patterns at adolescence.

If you are a QPOC, know someone who is one, or want to find out more resources, the National Queer and Trans Therapists of Color Network provides more information, including a directory of therapists who are QPOC, where you can learn more about how intersectionality affects them. 


Are you a QPOC? If you are one, how does your race, sexuality, and/or gender affect you? How do you think intersectionality, or belonging to more than one marginalized group, can affect one’s identity and mental health?

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Where Do LGBT+ Youth Look for Mental Health Support?

March 28, 2023 in Social Media Guide

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Although the internet is most likely the preferred method for pretty much anyone trying to learn more information, whether it be news stories, recipes, or advice from those who have gone through similar experiences, it’s particularly important for LGBT+ youths.

The Trevor Project released a new national report recently about LGBT+ youth mental health, and while some of the results they found, while upsetting, may not seem surprising (for example, more than half of LGBT+ youth experienced depressive symptoms in the past year, have faced discrimination, and felt that the recent political climate and COVID has negatively impacted their mental health or sense of self), they also included some information about how LGBT+ youth use social media.

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One of the ways that LGBT+  youth use social media is through a means of support for the above items. Online community is an important aspect for LGBT+ people on social media, since it gives them a place to talk to and be with others who understand what they’re going through and can provide advice, and it gives them a chance to explore their identity before they’re comfortable enough to come out to those they know in real life. Most LGBT+ youth reported that they had access to social media spaces that supported their identities: 69% said they used social media for LGBT+-affirming spaces, compared to 50% at school and 34% at home.

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And while major social media sites like Youtube and Facebook have been criticized – especially recently – for how they moderate LGBT+ harassment on their platforms, LGBT+-affirming spaces on social media can include finding information too. This could include watching Tiktoks or YouTube videos about gender transition or joining private groups to see how other LGBT+ youth cope with the mental health issues they may be going through and how it ties in with their identity.

There’s a comfort for people to look for information and help online in general, but for LGBT+ youth, this comfort also comes with the feeling of safety, without feeling like they have come out to those they know in real life in order to seek the treatment that they may need, especially if they aren’t sure how those people will react. Of course, it’s equally as important to consider your safety on social media too when looking for a community or for information, but there is also an anonymity tied to it that can make navigating your identity a little bit easier.


What sources have you used online to learn more about mental health? If you identify as queer, are there any that specifically talk about LGBT+ mental health?

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“Accidental Bullying” — Has This Ever Happened To You Or Someone You Know?

March 27, 2023 in Social Media Guide

Have you ever heard of “accidental bullying?” The term was coined by author Sue Scheff. It refers to a situation when someone unintentionally hurts another person’s feelings in a public way—for example, on social media. To learn more about accidental bullying, read Scheff’s article in HuffPost and watch the video below.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=97de0hsC7xI

“It was just a joke… But it’s not so funny anymore.” 

She thought the note he gave her was silly, and she shared it online with her friends and made fun of him in messages. And now her “joke” has ruined the young man’s reputation.

Have you ever been an accidental bully? or accidentally bullied someone else?  

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Deciding What Social Media Platforms May be Negatively Impacting You

March 16, 2023 in Social Media Guide

How many social media accounts do you have? A Pew research study found that about 75% of adults have more than one social media account. This number is likely to be pretty high in teens and adolescents who grew up with technology and social media.

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Not all social media platforms are created equal, though. Some serve different purposes, like how some are likely to use Twitter for news and Instagram to share their creative photography. Despite these different purposes however, there’s been a lot of overlap now that these platforms share a lot of features and have a lot of users on them.

With that all being said, the aesthetics of the site, the people you follow, and how those people share and post content can affect you differently depending which one you’re on. For some, these different feelings might be obvious, but it’s likely that you’re unable to tell because of the sheer amount of accounts that you may be cycling through. After a while, using these sites may all blur together, which may also contribute to that overwhelming, stressful feeling you might get by spending a lot of time on social media.

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So if you are feeling overwhelmed by social media, or even if you feel like something is off and you’re mentally not feeling your best, it might help to apply some organization tips towards your phone, tablet, or computer. By spending a few minutes on the social media platforms you’re actively using, you can attempt to separate them and spend some time asking yourself questions about how each make you feel. You can write down these feelings about each platform, and afterwards take a few minutes to see which exactly are causing particular stronger negative emotions. You can ask yourself questions such as, “Why is this platform making me feel like this?” “Is this platform worth keeping?” “How can I improve my experience on this platform?”

Hopefully, by taking a step back and evaluating exactly which platforms are affecting you and why these platforms are doing so can give you some time to self-reflect and find ways to improve not just your social media experience, but your mood and mental health overall.


What are the social media platforms that you use the most frequently? Do you have more than one? Have you noticed if you feel differently depending on which one you’re on?

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Using Weighted Blankets to Stay Calm

March 13, 2023 in Be Positive

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It feels that there are a ton of products available recently to help your mental health, particularly with calming anxiety. Some use essential oils, or you may have heard of light lamps, and of course, the classic stress relief ball

Weighted blankets have started to become more popular recently. These products are a level up if you’re the type of person who finds comfort in burying yourself under the covers as a coping mechanism to calm down: they’re heavier versions of regular blankets ranging from 4 to 30 pounds specifically designed to help those with disorders just as anxiety, autism, and insomnia, with physicians recommending getting one that’s 10% of your body weight. The weight is evenly distributed and is meant to help “ground” the user – not in a way that traps them – but provides some sort of stability as they relax or sleep.

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The benefits of weighted blankets are mostly from people sharing anecdotes, or their personal stories about it, but some researchers have found that using a weighted blanket shows an increase in activity in people’s parasympathetic system (or the part of the nervous system that your body uses to rest and stay calm). Others have found that 78% of participants in their study preferred a weighted blankets as a calming mechanism and 63% reported lower anxiety. Users who have shared their experiences with weighted blankets include not just those experiencing anxiety, but PTSD as well, stating that it serves as a distraction for their brain.

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What’s important to keep in mind is that there hasn’t been as much research on the product and you should not use this if you have conditions such as sleep apnea or other sleep disorders, respiratory and/or circulation problems, or have a chronic health condition. Because of the weight and the material, weighted blankets can have a tendency to get too hot too, which may not be the best option during the summertime. It’s also not a cure-all: weighted blankets shouldn’t be used everyday nor as a substitute for therapy or medication.

If you have trouble sleeping at night due to anxiety or because of depression, need help coping help with anxiety or panic attacks, or just need something to help keep you calm when things get too overwhelming however, using a weighted blanket may be an option to consider.


Have you ever used a weighted blanket? How do you think they would be different than regular blankets? What other mechanisms have you used to relax and keep calm when you’re feeling overwhelmed?

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Navigating the Internet with Social Anxiety

February 28, 2023 in Social Media Guide

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It’s not uncommon to be anxious to meet new people or be in a new, unfamiliar environment. It’s also not uncommon to feel terrified before performing something in front of a crowd, whether it be alone or with others. It’s also not uncommon to even feel a little bit nervous meeting people you’re comfortable with and know pretty well.

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But then there’s social anxiety. Social anxiety takes this feeling and amplifies it, and being around others can cause physical symptoms such as sweating, nausea, and trembling. It can even have drastic effects on already established relationships and can prevent people from going to work and school. The fear of humiliation, judgment, and rejection when meeting others and taking part in activities can not only affect how those with social anxiety see themselves, but also prevent them from reaching their full potential.

Researchers have recently started looking into if similar results happen when people with social anxiety use social media and interact with others online. Often, the Internet is seen as a way of “escaping real life” and is a place of refuge with those with different degrees of social anxiety. This is true for adolescents too, who generally spend a significant time online as a whole. Studies have found that adolescents with social anxiety communicated online significantly more about personal things than those who said that they don’t have social anxiety or experience loneliness. Additionally, the more that an adolescent uses online games and spends time online gaming, the more likely they are to show more symptoms of social anxiety.

But why is it easier for adolescents with social anxiety to communicate online, to the point where they’re more likely to share more private and personal thoughts and information? One possible explanation is that they consider the spaces they go to online to be “protective” and find conversations online to be more satisfying. They don’t have to worry about seeing people’s reactions on their faces, which may cause worry, and they don’t have to feel the pressure of always having something to say.

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There is also an association between social anxiety disorder and other mental illnesses, such as depression. Additionally, adolescents with social anxiety may fear going to the doctor’s or a therapist’s office, talking to the receptionist, and calling to make the appointment in the first place. Because of this, some researchers are hoping that these findings about socially anxious adolescents and their preference for communicating online can help them come up with interventions and methods to also deliver over the Internet to help with their corresponding mental illnesses. Delivering similar methods over the Internet and social media can feel less intensive and be more likely to be completed.


Do you have social anxiety? Where are you more comfortable communicating with others: online or in person? What are instances that you can think of where using the Internet can cause social anxiety? Has any of this changed during quarantine?

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Knowing When to Disengage Online

February 13, 2023 in Social Media Guide

Now is a sensitive time more than ever. Current events are revealing the issues with the systems that have been in place in our society for not just the past few years, but for decades and centuries, and how these issues have been affecting certain groups more than others. The Internet and social media giving platforms to experts and those who have been affected have made it easier for them to educate and tell others why things are so difficult and how drastic the effects are for minority groups. You most likely have seen these kinds of posts on Instagram and twitter presented in colorful graphics with easy and simple to read text and pictures. 

Despite how well-presented these posts are though, taking in all this information can be a lot to handle. As a result, emotions can get very intense and high too. These emotions could depend on who you are: if you are someone from a marginalized group, you may find yourself triggered and getting understandably angry at the posts telling you things that you already know and live through. For those who are educating themselves and learning about these issues, you may find yourself feeling guilty for not knowing about it before, and unsure about how to acknowledge the privilege you have and your own problematic behaviors in the past. All of this doesn’t even consider the retaliating posts by trolls or those who either ignore or promote harmful behaviors at the expense of others. Seeing these can heighten emotions even further, most likely leading to anger and wanting to fight back.

Like we discussed with doomscrolling, it’s so easy to stay on your device when things are bad, and when they affect you directly, you may feel like you have to stay on because it concerns you. However, engaging with negative emotions isn’t just bad for your mental health at that moment, but can even affect how you feel and interact with others offline as these feelings linger. So how do you know when to put the device away, or at least change what app you’re on when these feelings occur?

We’ve given several tips already about asking yourself questions about your social media habits and how they make you feel, but during those moments when you can start feeling those intense emotions surface, asking these questions may not be the most accessible thing to do. If you’re itching to fight back to someone’s post or comment or feel yourself physically reacting with something like a clenched fist or chest, the quickest thing you can try doing is just closing the app. By either hitting control-W it on your computer or swiping it away on your phone, immediately withdrawing yourself from the situation can give you some sort of space to breathe. If you’re in a place that’s safe to do so, even just physically letting go of your phone or throwing it (gently) somewhere soft like your bed can get that immediate aggression out. Having accounts or apps that are positive and that make you feel good on hand can also help, and you can switch over to them as well. For example, Instagram allows you to bookmark posts to save in an archive that you can then organize – you could save things you enjoy looking at there and see those instead. 

Although things are constantly stressful now, it’s still possible to have some sort of control over just how stressful these things can make you. The way we engage and look at things online is just one step in doing that.


What kind of content have you been seeing online recently? Do you follow positive accounts on your social media platforms? What advice do you have for when you feel yourself getting upset or angry with things online?

What is Doomscrolling?

February 2, 2023 in Social Media Guide

Let’s admit it. It’s so easy to get sucked into our devices and the social media apps inside of them. Even if you feel like you’re not directly interacting with anyone and just refreshing, there’s something about these apps that can make three hours feel like three minutes, despite doing nothing.

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This addicting feeling of constantly refreshing and going to the same pages again and again can already affect us negatively, but if there’s a dominant news story or event that’s on everyone’s timelines, feeds, and pages, it’s not just easier to cycle through these apps, but the effects of it on us mentally can be even more severe. If we’re constantly seeing (and seeking) updates to negative news stories and people’s reactions and inputs on them in particular, we can get physically exhausted and our already heightened emotions of anxiety can get even higher.

Yet we can’t stop scrolling. Why is that the case?

Recently, COVID-19 and its effects on, well, everything, had dictionaries officially coining the term doomscrolling (or doomsurfing, whichever you prefer). It describes our need to continue to scroll and look up information about bad events, even if they make us feel bad in turn. We do so not only because we want to keep up to date on any new information coming out, but because our brains are more inclined to focus on and are more likely to get sucked into bad news instead of good news. Additionally, in a different take on FOMO, we stay on our devices and doomscroll because we’re afraid of missing what could be some sort of pivotal update.

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As the name suggests, however, doomscrolling isn’t great for our mental health. Because we already know about the bad event, we may already be feeling nervous, anxious, and even depressed. Continuing to engage with this bad news can send us downspiraling, especially for those who are prone to showing symptoms of mental illnesses such as depression and anxiety. We may be more inclined to believe conspiracy theories, or engage with incorrect and potentially dangerous information because we’re getting exposed to it and want something potentially positive to cling onto.

But social media is already hard to escape, especially during social distancing, and especially when we’re in the midst of a multitude of historical events, so how can you stop doomscrolling? Besides setting specific times to visit your preferred social media platforms, ask yourself about the people and the news organizations you follow and how much you trust them. 

Doomscrolling is incredibly easy to fall into, but with some work, it isn’t hard to escape out of it either.


Have you ever doomscrolled? Why do you think it’s so easy to get stuck doomscrolling? How do you tell yourself to get off of social media when there’s bad or depressing news happening?

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The Benefit of Naps

January 31, 2023 in Educate Yourself

You may have heard about the danger of depression naps before. However, this isn’t to imply that all naps are bad for you – in fact, they’re incredibly beneficial!

At first, naps can seem like a waste of time if you’re incredibly busy and are seen as a sign of laziness. They may also seem like the only thing your body and mind can do if you’re experiencing a depressive episode and don’t have the strength or motivation to do anything else. Naps are usually seen in a negative light for these reasons if you aren’t a child, despite the fact that they can help you become more alert, improves memory and creative thinking, and can improve your mood

This is partly because we’re told that we need to take advantage of as many things in 24 hours (clubs, homework, classes, socializing) as possible and that any “wasted time” like sleeping takes away from work. It also doesn’t help that adolescents are more vulnerable to sleep disruption (one reason being from the anxiety that comes with the many things they’re expected to accomplish) and shouldn’t be going to school as early as they do (experts have been pushing high schools to delay start times, for example). 

Overall, adolescents are not getting the amount of sleep that they should, and not giving yourself the time for that break and mental rest can ultimately lead to burnout, which can then lead to more depressive symptoms, like those dangerous and long depression naps.

This time of year might be a good time to start incorporating naps. The sun is starting to set earlier and may make you tired when it gets dark, but taking a quick nap can refresh you so that you can stick to your regular sleep schedule. For those who are dealing with the burden and accompanying anxiety that may come with exams and finals, taking a break by taking a nap can have you shut off your brain for a while to give it a quick recharge

Of course, it can be really easy and tempting to keep your eyes closed for “five more minutes.” There are a few guides and tips online to help make sure you stick to your schedule, but consider the following:

Time and schedule naps:

Just like any other habit, napping should have some consistency. Everyone’s daily routine changes and no one’s is the same, but if you can find a period of time that you feel would be good for your child to squeeze a few minutes in, their body will start to associate it as a “recharge” time. They shouldn’t be too late in the day or too long either – most places suggest somewhere between 10-30 minutes.

Do NOT sleep in your bed

Even though this is a place where you’re meant to sleep, your body associates it with long periods of rest. If you nap here, you’ll likely find yourself sleeping for hours instead of a few minutes.

Plan the space accordingly

While you want to be comfortable, you don’t want the space to be cozy to the point that you never want to get out – you’re only there for a brief period of time after all. Make sure the space is dark, but cool, and use a lighter blanket as opposed to an entire comforter. 

Keep your phone away

It can take a bit before you eventually fall asleep for your nap, and can therefore be tempting to go on your phone. Also, once your alarm goes off, having your phone next to you makes hitting the snooze button that much easier. Keeping your phone away (and on “do not disturb” to avoid notifications!) will force you to get up to turn off the alarm. If you have a smartwatch, try putting your alarm on there instead.

Ultimately, naps are a good thing, but it also (ironically) includes some hard work to make sure you’re taking them in a healthy way. You know your own mind and body the best, and it’s up to you to determine if they’re helpful to you, how much you need them, and when to tell that they’re becoming an issue and a sign of burnout and depression. That being said, getting that extra (or even missing) rest can be a pleasant and mood-boosting habit you can incorporate in your routine!


Do you take naps? What do you think of them? How would you differentiate depression naps and regular naps?

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Being Only Human

January 30, 2023 in Be Positive

Almost anything can affect us negatively. Pretty much anything can affect us to an extreme degree, even if we don’t expect it to. It can be the major, like aspects of a relationship (friend, family, romantic, or others) that hurt you, to what feels like the minor, like unpredictable changes in routine

Over the years, you may have been able to pinpoint exactly what it is that triggers or upsets you, have likely developed some sort of skill to help you manage the negative emotions tied to that instance. If your sibling makes fun of you, you may have learned to laugh it off and play along instead of letting it get to you. If you take unexpected changes in your routine really poorly, you may have come up with ways to adjust and become more flexible. 

However, sometimes you may find yourself reacting the way you used to before developing these coping mechanisms, and that can lead to a whole other level of bad feelings.

Let’s take a bad grade, for example. Say you didn’t do well on a paper, and you find yourself experiencing depressive symptoms, and overall just feeling really bad about yourself. You find yourself blaming yourself for not starting earlier, or not doing one more read-through before submitting, or get upset at yourself for messing up in a class that otherwise has gone well for you.

And when these self-blaming thoughts begin to happen, you then find yourself getting angry at yourself too. This isn’t the first bad grade that you’ve gotten, so why are you taking it so hard now? You’ve taken other bad grades really well before, and know that you’ll survive this one too, so why are you experiencing these feelings that you know are tied to your depression or anxiety? It’s easy to slip into these thoughts that you’re no longer good at your coping mechanisms or all the growth that you’ve made to combat these negative things in your life is all of a sudden going away.

In these instances, it’s important to remember that bad feelings and getting upset about things that you thought you’ve grown past are just natural feelings that occur. Growth is not a linear line, and there’s never truly an end goal where you’re cured and never going to feel those bad emotions again. Life – and the progress that you make in it – is more like a scribble than a line. Even if you feel like you’ve built a tough exterior and don’t let the negatives phase you doesn’t mean you’re completely immune to them, because ultimately, you’re a human who feels human emotions. 


What was something that bothered you a lot when you were younger that doesn’t anymore? Was there an instance where it occurred again and you ended up getting upset about it like you did when you were younger? How did you react to that?