SOVA Blog

What Makes Someone A Good Member of Your Support System

April 5, 2017 in Educate Yourself

A key part to improving and getting better while dealing with a mental illness is having a support system. That’s why at SOVA (and WiseSOVA) we are trying to start and build an online community that supports each other. However, a support system can include friends and family.  But when it comes to people how do you know what makes a good support person? Psychology today wrote a great article about what makes someone a good, supportive friend. Being a good supporter to someone is broken down into 3 major components: integrity, caring, and congeniality.

Photo Credit: ohthecuteness via Compfight cc

Photo Credit: ohthecuteness via Compfight cc

Integrity

Trustworthiness – knowing you can share your thoughts and feelings with this person and they won’t talk behind your back or tell others without cause

Dependability – You can count on them to be there for you when you need them, and will support and believe in you even when you can’t believe in yourself

Being able to trust – You feel comfortable being vulnerable with this person

 Caring

Empathy – Have the ability to understand what is going on with you or/and recognize your feeling and react accordingly

Non-judgmental – Friends are to uplift you, not accept you as you are-even if it is different them

Listening Skills – close communication where you can both share intimate thoughts, feelings, and experiences

 Congeniality

Fun to be around – you have to genuinely enjoying being around this person.

These are just a few traits to look for when building your support system. The people you surround yourself can impact how you see the world. Knowing that you have supportive, caring, and trustworthy people in your corner to help you through the good and bad times is something everyone should be looking for. Reaching out for help can be difficult to do at times, but if you have a group of people surrounding you, whether in person or through an online community, that are non-judgmental, attentive and trustworthy can make life and its challenges slightly easier.

What are some traits you look for when finding supports in your life?

Easy-to-learn Yoga Poses

April 4, 2017 in Educate Yourself

Yoga is a great way to relieve stress and negative emotions. Some people who practice yoga regularly can do some pretty cool poses. When you’re first starting out with yoga, it’s good to start with the basics. SOVA’s alum, Amie, put some awesome YouTube videos together outlining some yoga poses. If you’re looking to read more about Yoga and its benefits, here are some blog posts we’ve done.

  1. Reducing Stress with Easy Yoga
  2. When in doubt, “OM” it out
  3. Stop, Breathe, Think

Check out the videos and let us know what you think!

 

Selena Gomez Talks About Her Mental Health

April 3, 2017 in Be Positive

Photo Credit: conceptx_design Flickr via Compfight cc

Photo Credit: conceptx_design Flickr via Compfight cc

Selena Gomez recently spoke to Vogue magazine about her experiences with mental illness and getting help. Selena is another example of a celebrity using their voice to erase the stigma about mental illness and getting treatment. The things that celebrities say have a lot of push. Their message is able to reach a huge mass of people. For Selena- or anyone for that matter- to be open about mental illness helps to normalize the experience and decrease stigma. Here are some of her quotes about mental health.

Blurbs from Selena’s Vogue interview

Before getting treatment, Selena was on tour performing her music. Looking back, she had this to say in her Vogue magazine interview:

“My self-esteem was shot. I was depressed, anxious. I started to have panic attacks right before getting onstage, or right after leaving the stage. Basically I felt I wasn’t good enough, wasn’t capable. I felt I wasn’t giving my fans anything, and they could see it—which, I think, was a complete distortion…”

Selena acknowledges that she wasn’t trying to figure out her mental health problems at the time. She went on to tell Vogue this about what she wanted to say to her fans:

“What I wanted to say is that life is so stressful, and I get the desire to just escape it. But I wasn’t figuring my own stuff out, so I felt I had no wisdom to share. And so maybe I thought everybody out there was thinking, This is a waste of time.”

Fortunately, Selena got treatment.  She received Dialectic Behavior Therapy. To learn more about DBT check out our recent blog post on it! Here’s what Selena had to say about DBT, stigma, and pushing back against unhealthy roles:

“DBT has completely changed my life,” she says. “I wish more people would talk about therapy. We girls, we’re taught to be almost too resilient, to be strong and sexy and cool and laid-back, the girl who’s down. We also need to feel allowed to fall apart.”

With the help of treatment, Selena talked about the relief she felt. She expresses letting go of the pressure, most of which she was putting on herself.

“For a change,” she says, “it feels like I don’t have to be holding my breath and waiting for somebody to judge a piece of work that I’m doing. I’m not eager to chase a moment. I don’t think there’s a moment for me to chase.”

To read Selena’s vogue magazine interview in its whole, follow this link. There is some profanity.

In what ways, if any, can you relate to what Selena is saying? Let us know in the comments below!

Learn more about Myths Dealing with Mental Health

March 31, 2017 in LINKS

Mental Health.gov compiled a list of 9 commonly believed myths about mental health and provides facts to prove them wrong.  Many people have learned inaccurate information about people with mental health issues for a variety of reasons.  Whether it be because of how media displays mental health, or a lack of experience and exposure with the population.  Listed below are 2 of the myths on the site to see more visit MentalHealth.gov.

Photo Credit: shenamt via Compfight cc

Photo Credit: shenamt via Compfight cc

Myth: People suffering from a mental illness are weak and chose not to work hard enough to fix the problem.

Fact: Having a mental health problem has nothing to do with a person’s character.  Or whether or not someone is lazy or weak.  Many different factors contribute to mental health problems such as the following:

  • Biological factors, such as genes, physical illness, injury, or brain chemistry
  • Life experiences, such as trauma or a history of abuse
  • Family history of mental health problems
  • People with mental health problems can get better and recover completely from a disorder much like someone can improve after having a broken arm.

Myth: I can not do anything that would make a difference to a person with a mental illness.

Fact: Family and friends can really influence a person with a mental illness.  56% of the population of people with a mental health disorder do not get the help they need.  Fewer than 20% of children receive the treatment they need according to the mentalhealth.gov.  Family and friends can really create an impact and here are some ways you could help:

  • Helping them access mental health services
  • Doing your part by educating yourself and those around you about mental health
  • Keeping in mind that people suffering with a mental illness deserve respect
  • Refusing to define them by their diagnosis or using labels such as “crazy”
  • Making sure they know you are available and willing to help

 

Can you think of any other myths surrounding mental health? Let us know in the comment below.

Heard Around Mental Health Twitter

March 30, 2017 in Social Media Guide

There are some pretty cool things happening in the world of mental health lately. We thought it’d be good to share some tweets from some mental health organizations. Social media has it’s downsides, but connecting people to resources is not one of them. Being aware about what’s going on in the mental health field is an important way to get the best information possible. These organizations are working hard to get the word out there about the importance of mental health. Check it out below!

Heard around mental health twitter

Today (3/30) is world bipolar day! This event is meant to bring awareness to bipolar disorders. Here’s what NAMI (The National Alliance on Mental Illness) had to say:Nami Tweet

@NAMICommunicate

Here’s a great tweet from Mental Health America suggesting a great way to “ground” yourself. If you’re feeling anxious or overwhelmed, this is a way to bring focus back to the present moment.

Mental Health America Tweet

@MentalHealthAm

The National Institute for Mental Health is hosting a webinar focused on teenage depression on 4/27/17. We linked to the details below!NIMH Tweet

@NIMHgov

Follow this link to learn more about the webinar

The next mental health organization, Bring Change 2 Mind shared a great article on their twitter that talks about self-care. The article talks about self-care pins that can be bought and worn in support of self-care and mental health– It’s a cool new way to fight stigma! We link to the article below the tweet.

BC2M Tweet

@BC2M

Here’s a link to the artcle, Everyday Bravery Pins Celebrate Big and Small Life Accomplishments from themighty.com

Lastly, here’s a tweet from Active Minds, Inc. about “fighting” stigma and how easy that fight can become. Sometimes, it’s just a matter of starting the conversation.

Active Minds Tweet

@Active_Minds

Have you seen any great mental health information shared on social media lately? Let us know in the comments below!

“Smiling Depression” – A Mask Worn to Hide Feelings

March 29, 2017 in Educate Yourself

Smiling depression. A person can look as if their whole life is together but still be suffering from depression. Everyone experiences and expresses their depression symptoms differently. Psychology Today defines smiling depression as “appearing happy to others, literally smiling, while internally suffering with depressive symptoms. Smiling depression often goes undetected. Those suffering often discount their own feelings and brush them aside. They might not even be aware of their depression, or want to acknowledge their symptoms due to a fear of being considered weak.”

The smile this person wears might be a mask to cover and hide the feelings and emotions they are feeling. People suffering with depression can be working, have a family, participating in the actives they have always enjoyed, and even have an active social life. Hiding your feelings and just pretending to be alright is not beneficial. People that love and support you are often times more willing to help than we might think. Many people feel as if they will be a burden on others if they express their feelings of depression but if you avoid and deny your feelings they can’t be fixed.

Photo Credit: http://www.changedirection.org/

Photo Credit: http://www.changedirection.org/

NAMI has created a list of 3 ways that can help others or yourself if you are experiencing this. First, do your part to create more awareness to de-stigmatize mental illness. Often times people feel as if they need to wear this mask to cover their depression symptoms to “fit in” and that is not true. It is always more important to take care of your self and feel comfortable reaching out for help. Secondly, pay closer attention to those you love. Make sure to check on your family and friends. Don’t assume everything is all right in their life just because everything appears normal. Making sure someone feels heard and is not alone can be very helpful. Lastly, if you are the person suffering with smiling depression know you are not alone. Always remember, “you are enough, you are worthy, you are loved and you are not alone.”

Have you ever felt like you’re wearing a smiling mask for others? Let us know in the comments below. 

Tips on talking to parents

March 28, 2017 in Educate Yourself

Sometimes you might want to know what your parent or guardian thinks about something, but you’re just afraid of what will happen if you bring it up? Will they get mad? Will they lecture you? Will they not let you do something you really want to do? These worries can make you really not want to talk.parent-talk

This article from WebMD offers some useful tips on how to talk to parents. Its written for girls but the tips can apply to both!

One of the cool tips is sending out a “trial balloon.” Maybe you want to talk to your parents that your relationship with a significant other is getting more serious. You could try mentioning a friend who has been dating someone for awhile to get the conversation started slowly and see what they think in general.

Remember if you don’t feel comfortable talking to your parent about something important, you should see what a trusted adult thinks. Friends can be great but they don’t have the life experience to always give you the right advice. You can always talk to your primary care doctor in private. The law protects your confidentiality and your doctor can always help you talk to your parent about uncomfortable topics.

(featured image: “Highland Village Balloon Festival” by TexasEagle is licensed by CC-BY-NC-2.0)

Positivity for the Animal Lover

March 27, 2017 in Be Positive

For today’s daily dose of positivity, we wanted to share a website all about animals. The Dodo shares articles and videos “for animal people.” Their mission states: “Our goal is to serve up emotionally and visually compelling, highly sharable animal-related stories and videos to as many people as possible to help make caring about animals a viral cause.”

Photo Credit: Tambako the Jaguar via Compfight cc

Photo Credit: Tambako the Jaguar via Compfight cc

If you’re interested in checking out some cute animal videos, check out the site!

Crisis Hotline

March 24, 2017 in LINKS

If you or someone you care about is in crisis, time is of the essence.

Take some time now to check out a national resource we are lucky to have in the U.S.:

the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline

It will give you:

  • a number to call if you or someone you know is suicidal
  • how to tell if someone is suicidal
  • resources on finding a therapist or support group
  • how to create a safety plan to help get you past suicidal thoughts
  • stories and videos about hope and recovery5118029807_e84cff7b73_o

Featured Image: Hipstamatic Series by Fran Taylor CC BY-NC-ND 2.0

Let us know what you thought was useful about this website – share below!

How to Deal with Cyber Bullies

March 23, 2017 in Social Media Guide

Bullying and harassment are unacceptable whether it takes place in person or online.  First and foremost when it comes to bullying, it’s important to remember that it is not your fault.  Bullying is not just an argument you were pulled into but it is repeated and continuing cruel treatment. Some steps that you can take when you experiencing this in-the-moment is not to respond.  You don’t want to empower a bully by engaging in this negative and aggressive dialogue.  More often than not, it does nothing to help the situation.  It will often pull you out of character and potentially entice the bully to continue because they now know the effect they are having over you.  Instead of just going with your initial reaction and responding, save and remember the evidence so you can show it to someone to get help in the future.

https://pixabay.com/en/student-smartphone-bullying-girl-1397451/

https://pixabay.com/en/student-smartphone-bullying-girl-1397451/

If you feel like you are comfortable with it you can address the bully and make it clear to them that this behavior is unacceptable and they cannot treat you in this manner, but reaching out for help is really important.  Being bullied is not something that you need to or should have to deal with alone.  Find someone you feel like you can talk to and will have the resources to help you through this like a friend, relatives, or a trusted adult.  It is especially important to get help when the bullying is really effecting you  in a negative way because you deserve the support. The cruel treatment is not something you have to deal with by yourself.  The police can also become involved when physical threats are being made.

Social media platforms allow you to report and block users.  Doing this will not necessarily stop the bullying but you will not be seeing the abuse regularly which can help you cope with the situation.  The last protective measure you can use on social media platforms is changing your privacy setting.  Making sure your accounts are private which will give you the ability to choose who can comment, like, follow, and see your content.

These tips with more information to help when being cyberbullied can be found on connectafely.org

Have you had an experience with cyber-bullying? We’d love to hear how you handled it in the comments below.