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What is Sadfishing?

October 3, 2019 in Social Media Guide

Unless you live across the pond, you probably haven’t heard of sadfishing. You may have experienced the phenomenon, but just without a name to give it. 

Lately, the conversations surrounding mental health have started to become more common and openly accepted. This is especially true online: there are tons of accounts over all social media platforms with shareable posts about the importance of taking care of yourself and information about mental illness. You have likely seen posts from friends and celebrities opening up about their struggles and hard times that they’ve gone through, too.

This second point is where sadfishing comes in. According to Digital Awareness UK, an agency in the UK that aims to promote safe and responsible behavior online (especially for teens), adolescents who post things about their mental health, mental illness, or even simply sadder posts feel like they’re accused of sadfishing and face backlash from their peers as a result.

Sadfishing is when people allegedly post on social media where they exaggerate what they’re going through or make stuff up in order to get attention (and on social media, that means comments, likes, and shares). There aren’t any examples of this actually happening, but there are a lot of examples of adolescents being accused of it, when all they really want and need is support when they post their vulnerabilities online. 

Accusing people of sadfishing – even implying that sadfishing is a thing – can have a lot of negative effects. Aside from the accusation, sadfishing may make the conversation about mental health go backwards. People have started becoming more vulnerable online, but the fear of being accused of doing it for attention may make them decide not to do post this kind of content anymore, even if they are seeking support. This can also affect other users who could have used that vulnerable post to feel like they’re not alone in their own struggles.

The person who coined the term didn’t do so with this intention though. The journalist mentions that the term was never created so people stop talking, but because sadfishing is likely to be present in celebrities, where they might be picking and choosing what to reveal based on what works for their image. She argues that it’s important to normalize sadness and mental illness, but with social media, it’s easy to manipulate what you want to talk about in order to make it shareable or the social media stats that we crave online (you can read her original article about sadfishing and the Kardashians here).

She legitimizes sadfishing and what it’s become, however: “lots of us sadfish sometimes, and that’s okay. Attention seeking is a perfectly legitimate thing. There’s nothing wrong with wanting attention.”

How do you feel about the term sadfishing? Have you seen posts by friends or celebrities where they’ve opened up about mental illnesses? How do you remember reacting to them? If you post about mental health on other social media sites, how do you do so?

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Breaking the Stigma: What you Can Do

October 2, 2019 in Educate Yourself

One of my most well-kept secrets for a long time has been that I was hospitalized for my mental health. I was hospitalized for two weeks, and then in partial hospitalization at another location for four weeks. As a year out of the hospital is quickly approaching, I am taking time to think about this experience, and why I was so embarrassed to share it with others.

One thing I have learned is that although being hospitalized for medical reasons versus mental health reasons should not be all that different, they are treated as such. There is no stigma around me saying, for instance that I have spent time in the hospital in the past for seizures. But there seems to be a stigma around me saying I was hospitalized for my depression.

My goal for this semester was to be more open and honest about this part of my life, since breaking the stigma starts with each and every one of us. It is okay not to feel comfortable sharing your story with others, but I have found that it really helps. When I tell people that, despite having been at school here for almost two and a half semesters I barely have 20 credits, I have begun to follow it up with the full explanation of why. The response has been amazing. I have had many people who (very unexpectedly) shared their own similar story, or that of a family member. I have also experienced a general outpouring of support and sense of caring from others.

These reactions have helped me recognize that there is so much more to me than this one part of my past, and these troubles that I have faced are more common than I think. I feel that I have also done my small part to break the stigma around mental health, and I have shown people that you never actually know what someone is going through. I challenge you, if you are comfortable, to share with others at least some parts of your difficulties with mental health. You may find that it helps you, and in the process, it helps them as well.

Have you ever opened up to anyone about your experiences with mental health? Has anyone every opened up to you? 

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Calming Down through…Smell?

September 30, 2019 in Be Positive

Take a moment to think of scents that make you happy. It could be the smell of your favorite food, your significant other’s perfume, or the scent of opening up a new binder. 

There’s something about scents in particular that seem to evoke strong emotions and feelings. Think of nostalgia, for example. Sure, you may have vague memories about certain things in your life, but get a whiff of something like sunscreen and all of a sudden you’re transported back to that beach you used to go to all the time growing up. Not only may you find yourself nostalgic, but you may see an increase in your mood as you remember splashing in the water and the feeling of sand through your toes. 

Why is this the case though? Some scientists have found that there’s a connection between the olfactory bulb (or the part of the brain that processes smells when you sniff something) and the amygdala (the part of your brain associated with emotions and memory). They’re both a part of the limbic system, so they have access to each other. 

Good smells and its association with mood isn’t just limited to nostalgia though. Pleasant smells in general have been found to be relaxing; one study saw that the smell of oranges in a waiting room lowered anxiety levels for patients waiting for their dentists appointments, for example.

Overall, our sense of smell can cause us to react strongly to things. It may be because it’s a sense we don’t use as commonly as sight and hearing, so exposure to strong scents can cause these sensations (alternatively, bad smells can make us annoyed, stressed, and emphasize bad sensations like nausea).

And just like a clean and organized environment, having nice scents that make you happy in a place where you spend a lot of time can have a huge impact on your mood. If you want to go the nostalgic route, you can have air fresheners around you that smell like clean laundry or baby powder. You can also keep an orange or something citrus-scented (like lotion) to eat or use before an exam to help calm you down.

Good smells can have a positive impact on our moods and even calm us down, whether it be through them simply smelling nice or sending us back to simpler, happier times. Just be careful what it is though and where you use it; that nice smell could be bad to someone else, and no one likes being around things that smell gross.

What are your favorite scents? How do you feel when you smell them? How do you think you can keep them on you during stressful events?

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An App to Consider: Oak

September 27, 2019 in LINKS

There are a lot of benefits to deep breathing. Although the steps are incredibly simple (deep breath in, hold, breathe out, repeat), you can try different patterns and lengths of time, and may need some assistance with it. You may also want a source of some background noise instead of searching “calming sounds” online and hoping for the best.

Oak is just one of many apps available on your phone that you can download in order to get introduced to and practice meditating and deep breathing. The interface is simple: everything is listed on two pages and doesn’t require much scrolling.

Oak Meditation
Oak Meditation

The first page divides the types of meditating into three sessions: Meditate, Breathe, and Sleep. Although they’re self-explanatory, each comes with a little description, and choosing one of the 2-3 activities under each one will explain what that one helps with in more detail. For example, one of the Breathe activities has one that’s there to help you wake up, while one of the Sleep ones has a series of exercises over a longer period of time to help lull you to bed.

Oak Meditation
Oak Meditation

The time of each activity ranges and you can set how long you want them to be. The Meditate and Sleep ones are a little bit longer and let you choose the gender of the voice guiding you, and the Breathe exercises are a little bit shorter. The Meditate and Sleep ones also give you the choice of what background noises you want (if any), which includes different levels of rain, white noise, and a fireplace.

Oak Meditation
Oak Meditation

The second page tracks your progress. If sticking to a schedule or maintaining a routine can be overwhelming or stressful for you, you can easily ignore this part. However, you can look here to see your streaks and how many days in a row you’ve meditated, the longest streak you’ve had (if you want a record to beat), and how many minutes and sessions you’ve done that day and total. You can also see in real time how many others are using the app and have used it that day, which can help normalize the activity and make you feel a little less alone.

The app is free and doesn’t require an account. Unfortunately, it’s only available on the App Store, so if you have an iPhone, you can download it here.

Have you tried deep breathing or meditation? Would you use an app to help guide you? What other recommendations do you have?

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Going Private

September 26, 2019 in Social Media Guide

You may think of two different things when you think about social media. You may think that social media makes everyone an open book, spilling all their secrets and sharing too much information so you know where they are, what they’re eating, and who they’re with at any given moment. You may alternatively think that social media is fake and controlled, and that people on social media only share what they think will get them the most attention.

Regardless, social media is a place where we know that almost any and everyone can see the content we create and share, and with that may come a need to make sure that they think what we put up is valid. It can be stressful to always think about pleasing everyone, and the fear that someone you don’t know as well (or don’t even know at all!) can find your content and respond with a negative comment can be anxiety-inducing.

Fortunately, most, if not nearly every social media platform comes with an option to go private, or at the very least, control who sees your profile and your accounts. Twitter and Instagram give you the ability to lock your account completely and limit who follows you, because you have to approve those who request to follow you. Snapchat has the option for you to only allow friends you add to see your content, and Facebook lets you decide how much anyone can see on your account – friends included.

Having this kind of control and privacy can give you a peace of mind: the people you approve to follow your account are those you trust, and you don’t have to feel like you’re trying to get their approval all of the time. There’s also the safety aspect too: only having a few people have access to your information means that it’s less likely to get out and receive unwanted attention. Overall, there’s been an increase in demand from adolescents to make accounts automatically private for these reasons, alongside others.

Take finstas. While often regarded as a sillier private space, adolescents say that they feel more like their genuine selves and don’t hesitate to hit the “share” button because they’re comfortable with those following them. And while silly, they’re still a safe place. Queer adolescents have commented that having this separate account takes the weight off of their shoulders about receiving hateful comments or those they’re not close with speculating about their sexuality. 

While getting likes and comments may be validating, they can also be damaging to your mental health and in comparing yourself to others. Private accounts can give you a space to fully be yourself without worrying about these statistics and may increase your enjoyment on social media as a whole.

Are your accounts locked? Are there some that are unlocked and some that you keep completely private? How do you think limiting the people you have follow you impacts  your social media use?

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School Reminders

September 25, 2019 in Educate Yourself

Back-to-school is always rough. If you’re like me, spending the summer on island time, the abrupt slide back into due dates and schedules and meetings is the worst. In the microcosm of school, there is always a pressure to be doing something productive at all times. But there are good parts about school too! I need to remind myself of these things sometimes to get out of bed, so maybe they’ll help you too.

Getting to see friends: This is the best part of school for me. I know that if I didn’t see most of my friends at school, I’d never see them. Think of how you feel when the people you talk to in a certain class are missing. They feel the same way about you when you’re missing!


Moving around: If left to my own devices, I would stay in my room all day, leaving only to eat. That’s not healthy. School makes you get out of the house, interact with people, learn new things, and get up and walk around. If you have gym class, that’s another opportunity to get some exercise in. 


Opportunities to be involved: At my school, the Activities Office claims that extracurricular activities are “the other half of education.” While I’m not necessarily joining clubs to educate myself, I know that I can learn practical skills from them that I can’t learn in a classroom. School activities are wide-ranging and usually very accepting. Even if you don’t take, say, a digital art class, you can still participate in an art club, a graphic design club, or make illustrations for the school newspaper.


It Ends: Even knowing the above three things are true, it can still be hard to make yourself go to school. School might seem endless, but every day, the dismissal bell rings. Every June, another class graduates. Every year, you have another summer vacation. Everything ends, even school. As I go into my senior year, there’s a lot of emphasis placed on “my last” everything.

But each of those “lasts” are only “my last” in high school. There will be so much more for me beyond high school that, in the grand scheme of things, I can’t worry too much about going to “my last” dance or picnic. There’s always more. There’s always another day. 

But you won’t know if you don’t go.

What do or did you like about high school? Is or was there anything that got you through or even motivated you to go? How do you remind yourself that academics aren’t everything when it comes to school?

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Athletes’ Takes on Their Mental Health

September 20, 2019 in LINKS

In any given year, one in five Americans will experience a mental illness. Of these people, 30% will choose not to seek help because they are worried about the negative perceptions of others.

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This stigma surrounding mental health affects everyone but is especially relevant to men. A national poll found that one-third of boys between the ages of 10-19 years old felt that when they are scared or sad, society expects them to “suck it up” and “be a man.” In an effort to combat this, several male athletes have recently come forward to share their stories with mental illness and stigma in hopes of helping others through the mental health section of the website The Players’ Tribune. This website was created for all sorts of athletes to connect with fans by writing their own blog posts and stories. These specific stories show that mental illness doesn’t discriminate, and even the men who are thought to be some of the toughest people in our society have and are affected by it.

Check out a list of some of their mental health stories below, proving that being tough is about how one reacts to their diagnosis and how they work through it:

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“Everyone is Going Through Something” by Kevin Love

Kevin Love, center for the Cleveland Cavaliers, discusses how a panic attack in the middle of a basketball game changed his perspective on mental health. With vignettes about growing up and learning how “to be a man” to his first experience with a therapist, Lore concludes that “not talking about our inner lives robs us of really getting to know ourselves and robs us of the chance to reach out to others in need.”

“The Stigma” by Brandon Marshall

NFL linebacker Brandon Marshall discusses how participating in an outpatient group therapy session at McLean Hospital helped him realize millions of people are suffering with mental illness in silence. While battling his own diagnosis of Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD), Marshall continues to fight against the stigma of mental illness through the creation of Project 375.

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“Dark, Dark, Dark, Dark, Dark, Dark, Dark, Dark” and “You Are Not Alone” by Corey Hirsch

NHL player Corey Hirsch has written two articles discussing his mental health. The first details his experience with OCD before he was diagnosed, how persistent thoughts made him think he was crazy, and how he stopped himself from carrying through on a suicide attempt. The next article discusses the positive reaction he received to his first story, how important it is to get the proper help, and how he believes children need to be educated with basic knowledge about anxiety, depression, OCD and other mental health issues.

What do you think about the website The Players’ Tribune, especially about their section dedicated to mental health? Do you think athletes sharing their stories and using their voices can help reduce stigma, especially male athletes? Do you recognize any of the names or teams listed here or on the site?

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Is Not Using Smartphones Actually Bad for Your Mental Health?

September 19, 2019 in Social Media Guide

The popular narrative says that social media, smartphones, and constantly being online has had a negative effect on our mental health, especially for adolescents. It can be difficult not to be bogged down by comparing ourselves to others, wanting validation for content that we create through likes and comments, or feeling confused and anxious about a possible subtweet. 

One recent study found the opposite result, however. They found out that after surveying about 7,000 people between 15-65, those who felt that they didn’t use their smartphones that regularly were more likely to have worsened mental health conditions. 

So, is it possible that not being on your smartphone, and by extension, not being on social media, can actually be worse for your mental health than being on it constantly?

Well, it depends. 

Spending too much time on your smartphone can have detrimental effects on your productivity, which can lead to intense feelings of anxiety because you aren’t focusing on important things that need to get done. Spending too much time can also distort your perceptions of people, especially physically, which can lead you feeling self-conscious about your own looks.

On the other hand, smartphones (and the Internet as a whole) are almost vital parts of society today. Nearly everyone has one and has some sort of social media account (if not several) that allows them to talk to others, have access to information, and connect with those who aren’t physically closeby. The study mentions that the primary impact that not using smartphones has on your mental health is that it can emphasize loneliness. Just like you can experience FOMO by being on social media by seeing posts of people hanging out without you (even if you don’t know them!), you can also experience it by not being on it too. Being off the grid may make you feel like you’re missing a lot of things online, and if those things get brought up in person (like a meme), you might feel awkward that you can’t relate and that people will like you less. 

So if you experience FOMO and loneliness on social media and experience FOMO and loneliness off of social media, what can you do to avoid it? Battling loneliness can be really difficult – no one wants to feel like they have nobody there for them – but things like battling these negative thoughts by remembering recent times when you were with people you liked or thinking of positive qualities about yourself can help. You can also trick your mind to think of loneliness as alone time. Activities like putting on a podcast and going for a walk, doing a at-home spa day, or going to a coffee shop to read a book gives you time to focus on yourself but is also distracting enough so that you don’t get overwhelmed by negative thoughts about yourself.

There’s always a middle ground when it comes to technology use too: if you feel like you spend too much time on social media and are experiencing loneliness, you can try to reach out to a friend and make plans to hang out in person. Alternatively, if you feel like not using your phone is making you lonely, you can text a friend and strike up a conversation about . Whatever it is, you have the power to navigate how social media and your phone make you feel.

Have you ever gone off the grid? How do you feel when you don’t use your phone for a long period of time? Do you have any advice about how to combat FOMO and loneliness?

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Going Back to School

September 18, 2019 in Be Positive, Educate Yourself

School is starting again which can be extremely anxiety-inducing for many teenagers. I know it is for me at least especially since it is my senior year and I have to apply to colleges. When returning to school, you see many people whom you haven’t seen for three months which may make you feel like they are judging you and, especially in high school, you get a ton of homework almost immediately. I have a few strategies that help me reduce my anxiety in school.

One thing I have found extremely helpful was finding a few friends whom I trust extremely well and also suffer from anxiety. All of us prefer quieter environments, so to avoid the yelling in the cafeterias, we all eat lunch in one of our teacher’s classrooms whom we also trust and has known us for three years. She is there for us to talk to about our problems or anything that is going on in our lives and has been really helpful whenever any of us has been feeling overwhelmed.

Another thing I have found helpful is asking the teachers of some of my work-intensive classes to tell me what homework we will have for the whole week either the Friday before the week starts or on Monday. This helps me to make a plan as to when I will do the homework and be aware in advance of the amount of work I will have. This helps me stop myself from procrastinating for as long which results in me being too overwhelmed by the end of the week.

I hope this helps other people and I would love to hear other people’s methods of reducing their anxiety during school!

How do or did you handle anxiety in high school? Do you have any advice about applying that to anxiety during college?

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#MyYoungerSelf

September 13, 2019 in LINKS

There’s no start date when it comes to mental illness. While depression is often considered to start in adulthood, the truth of the matter is that it can occur at any age. Half of people who experience mental health conditions do so before they’re 14, with 75% doing so before they’re 24.

When you’re a child however, you most likely have no idea that the things you’re experiencing are symptoms of mental illness. Because of things like stigma and a lack of understanding that children can have mental illnesses, these symptoms can be dismissed as a child having a bad attitude, poor parenting, or simply just the child being emotional. It’s not until you’re older that you may have looked back and realized that some of the things you experienced and did as a child were either symptoms or the first few signs of mental illness. These can feel like “aha!” moments in putting the puzzle pieces together in your mental health journey.

My Younger Self

The Child Mind Institute is focused on spreading awareness on children’s mental health and providing the tools to help people realize that mental illness can happen to anyone, regardless of age. As a part of their outreach, they have a feature where notable figures and celebrities who have mental illnesses leave short videos to their younger selves (appropriately named #myyoungerself). These include Kristen Bell, who has anxiety and depression, Michael Phelps, who has ADHD, and Emma Stone, who has anxiety and a panic disorder. 

They all discuss the mental illness diagnoses they have and when they first noticed that they experienced their symptoms. The messages are often pieces of advice, reassuring their younger selves that it gets better and that what they’re going through is justified. While it’s a message to themselves, it’s also a great way for viewers to recognize that they aren’t alone in their struggles and that even the most successful people struggle too.

What would you tell your younger self about your mental health? Do you think that you had any moments as a child, where looking back, you realize that they may have been the first symptoms of you experiencing depression, anxiety, or something else?

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