SOVA Blog

by Volleyball04

Quarantine and mental health

April 15, 2020 in COVID-19, Educate Yourself

When quarantine first began, my head wasn’t fully wrapped around on what was happening. I honestly thought that it would be more of a time where I would get two weeks out of school and everything else would be normal.

Man, was I wrong. It’s been about a month with no school and I am really starting to feel the effects of little social interaction. Yes, I still see my family everyday, but it’s a new and strange experience to not see my best friends everyday at school. Usually I get to wake up and see them for over half of my day but for the past month the only way to connect with them is over the phone. I’m very happy I have that option to still be able to communicate with them but it’s also different than talking face to face. Seeing my friends and going to school everyday is something I’ve definitely taken for granted and shouldn’t have. You don’t realize how much you utilize something so simple as school, until it’s gone.

During quarantine I’ve been focusing more on things I like to do like painting and drawing. I’ve also taken up new hobbies like sewing which I figured out I’m quite good at! I’ve sewn a face mask and a lip balm container so far. I surprisingly enjoy sewing! I understand that staying home while I’m healthy and well is best for everyone so no more people get sick, and even if it doesn’t directly affect me, it will affect someone else.

I’ve become more irritable with my family because not being able to see my friends everyday and do my normal routines is frustrating me. I’ve talked to both my mom and my therapist about it and they both understand me. My mom has agreed to helping me more and finding fun activities to do at home with the rest of my family. I have done a lot of baking haha. I’ve also used this time to catch up on Netflix shows which is something I never was able to do.

Overall the quarantine has its benefits and its downfall but in the end it is better for society as a whole. Stay safe, healthy, and wash your hands!

Has anything irritated you while in quarantine? Who are you currently living with, if you are living with someone, and how are you coping?

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by Volleyball04

Summer and Swimsuits

March 16, 2020 in Be Positive

The summer season is coming upon us fast. That means shorts, tank-tops, and one of my biggest causes of my anxiety, swimsuits. I’ve struggled with acceptance for my body type since I was very young. I’ve never been the girl with the nice body, and I never really looked like my friends. I’m shorter and a big larger than my friends. While they might not notice it, I do.

It causes a lot of stress in my day to day life in normal clothes, but swimsuit season is a whole other issue I tackle. I don’t like one pieces because I feel like they make me look more compressed, but I also don’t like bikinis because they show too much of my stomach that I am comfortable with. The biggest thing I don’t like about my thoughts is I will see a plus size model in magazines rocking a bikini and she will look gorgeous, but when I look in the mirror I think I don’t look the same and I should just cover up and skip the pool that day.

Now I’ve been trying to lose weight in a healthy way for a while now. Trying to limit the extra sugar and carbs I take, but while still meeting my daily calorie intake recommended by my doctor. My goal is to lose 20 pounds of fat, but in the meantime I’m working on loving myself at any number because I know the number on the scale doesn’t define who I am.

Now this story has a positive spin to it and here it is. So I went to the mall a week or two ago and out of nowhere I had the urge to try on some new swimsuits which is very out of my comfort zone. I tried on colors I would never imagine myself feeling comfortable in and to my surprise they were the colors I loved most on my body! I tried on pastel pink, yellow, and red and absolutely loved them. Normally I don’t go for lighter colors because I’m naturally pale and don’t tan well, but I loved how those colors looked on me.

For the first time ever I tried on a bikini and loved how I looked in it. It was high-waisted so it complimented my curves and covered the areas of my stomach I don’t love that much. I’ve never seen a brighter smile on my face in a dressing room than I did that day.

Does the summer trigger anxieties for you in anyway? How do you feel about “swimsuit season?” If you’re on the journey, what’s your experience been like with practicing body positivity and self-love?

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by Volleyball04

When You’re Friends with Both Parties of the Breakup

March 10, 2020 in Educate Yourself

So recently, my best friends have broken up and ended their relationship with each other. I was really close with both the boy and the girl, and I’m still close with both of them. I feel really torn on who to “side with.”

The girl ended the relationship because it started to take a toll on her mental health, which I completely understand and support. You shouldn’t stay with a person who brings you down. Now that the relationship is over she has been glowing with happiness and like a weight has been lifted off her shoulders.

I cannot say the same for the boy though. He has been depressed and sad the past week and a half and he feels completely hopeless without her. He thinks that she is the love of his life, when in reality we are all young and have so much more to experience before we decide who our life long love is.

I feel for both of them but am conflicted on who to side with more. I have been neutral in my stance and will most likely continue to be because I think it is the safest option to keep both of my friendships. When they speak about the other person I just respond with things like “I know where you’re coming from,” so I don’t necessarily agree or disagree with what they are saying. They are both great people and I don’t want either of them to feel hopeless over a high school relationship, but the advice I give to each of them seems to go over their heads.

I tell the boy that there are plenty more girls out there to meet and that there are lots of amazing girls out there but he still seems to think that she was the only one for him. And I know breakups can be hard, especially when they’ve lasted a long time, but I hate seeing him like this. It’s easier said than done to say “move on, there’s more out there,” but it’s what I’m seeing as the “outsider” of the situation. The advice I give to the girl is to stay friends with him so they don’t ruin their friendship but she wants none of it either. They were great friends but I don’t think a relationship was for them. It’s so hard to see people who are so close to me hurting so much, but I know the most important thing is to be a shoulder to lean on for both of them.

Have you ever been in the middle between two people close to you who are fighting or arguing? How did you navigate your relationships with them? How did it affect you?

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