Music is a part of the human psyche. Cavemen banged together stones rhythmically and vocalized. Music has evolved a lot since then and is constantly evolving.
I feel like everyone has this internal need to sing. Young children babble gibberish in a sing-song tune, people sing along to their liked songs, and sometimes they sing little improvised songs about mundane tasks.
And for me, music has always been a huge part of my life. Not making, writing, or playing music, simply listening. Since I’m an introverted person, music allows me to always have something to do. I probably looked like a weirdo, sitting among the noisy bus in fifth grade, clunky headphones, looking wistfully out the window, eyes unfocused. But it honestly made me content.
Recently I’ve realized that this might have been spurred on by my sensitivity to sound. The bus was too chaotically loud, and one of the only ways to block it out was blasting music. I wanted to listen to music I enjoyed, so I almost had to make it part of me. Even to this day, I can’t have multiple sounds existing at once, and my headphones have been my saving grace every time.
My music taste mostly comes from my mom. I often cite her showing me Green Day for the reason why I became punk. My taste currently is a mix of queercore and riot grrrl, which are both subgenres coming from punk. This type of music is often angry, with lyrics about stuff that resonates with me. Anger is bad in large quantities, that’s common knowledge, but anger in reasonable amounts can be powerful. As a former quiet introvert, I have a habit of being a pushover and a people pleaser. I lacked a backbone. But listening to this music has made me angry, a productive type of anger. This type of anger provokes me to be an activist.
It also makes me feel less alone. Some of the songs are about things I’ve gone through and felt. Seeing popular music artist that have gone through the same things as me and have come out stronger. It gives me hope for my future.
All in all, music is a building block of my personality, views, and simply how I carry myself.
What’s your relationship to music like? Are there certain genres that you find yourself using for different moods?