Experience in Therapy

I have never been the “type” to go to therapy. I like to deal with my problems on my own and keep things to myself. Starting a big new chapter in my life and dealing with existential dread and shifts in my long term relationship were what finally gave me a push to really consider going to therapy. I am lucky that this new chapter in my life provides me with a good health insurance plan, so I am financially able to go to therapy.

What actually got me on the phone trying to find a therapist was finances and the ability to hold therapy sessions remotely. I have been attending sessions for a time now and I am still not comfortable going. I don’t believe therapy should or is supposed to be comfortable. To make change and grow, one needs to get uncomfortable and be okaying digging into some of the feelings that we normally shy away from talking about.  It is okay if you are not there or ready when you first sign up. With time and growth in other, less stressful areas, you will one day be ready to open up about some of the harder hitting ideas you struggle with.

For people who struggle with talking about their feelings and difficult topics about their life with others, like I do, I urge you to try remote telehealth therapy sessions. It gives me comfort, though I’m never completely comfortable during sessions, to bring up some topics I never would if I were in person talking with someone. I don’t have to be nervous or stress about what my body is doing.

Some things I would worry about if I was in person:

  • Is my body sweating?
  • Am I shaking?
  • How am I sitting and how do I look?
  • Is my face red?
  • Is my stomach growling or upset?
  • Can other people tell?

These things are always running through my mind when I get nervous or am in an uncomfortable situation. Therapy is uncomfortable for me, but because it is remote, through a camera in my laptop, I do not have to worry about these things. I can focus on what I want to say and in pushing myself emotionally. I do not have to worry about the physical aspect of anything that normally takes up a lot of space in my brain and wastes time and energy. For anyone who is struggling right now and is able, reach out and try therapy. It has never been more accessible for those who can afford to go.

Do you attend therapy? Have you tried, or are you currently doing therapy virtually? What has stopped you from starting therapy? What would help you be able to start?

For those who have health insurance and are unsure how to afford therapy, check out a similar article here!

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