Now that we can (hopefully) see the soon to be light at the end of the tunnel for the quarantine and the aftermath of the COVID pandemic, I want to make sure we continue to check-in with ourselves and our own mental health. Things are starting to open up again after over a year and things will slowly begin to work their way closer to “normal.”
Category: Educate Yourself
Over the past few weeks and months, like many others, I have been struggling immensely with my mental health. A series of panic attacks, depressive episodes, and anxiety-filled breakdowns have really spiraled out of control due to a mix of stressors from work, family, and more. It got to a tipping point earlier this month when I felt uncomfortable being alone, and that’s when I knew that I needed more help.
The “model minority stereotype” of Asian Americans perceives them to be hardworking, and academically, economically, and socially successful when compared to all other racial minority groups. Because of this, Asian Americans are assumed to be at less risk of mental health problems.
I remember being complimented once by a therapist for being so “self-aware” and “in tune” with my emotions. This is true. I tend to be a person who can recognize a feeling and communicate how this feeling affects me to other people. But recently I’ve been having a more difficult time unpacking my physical and emotional feelings.
The past month has been difficult for me with new mental health symptoms, diagnoses, and medications. Because of my new symptom of fluctuating between having very little energy or motivation and then feeling very motivated and over-confident, my health care team has assigned me the task of completing a daily mood tracker.
I’ve always grew up being the kid who was good at everything. I always was praised for being the kind, helpful, smart little kid. Though these adjectives would occasionally boost my ego, they also had consequences. Once I had started to truly listen to these high praises, their words established an effect on me. I began believing that if I wasn’t always the perfect child at everything, I wouldn’t be loved anymore. I thought that I needed to always be the best, and while a hardworking mindset can be great, it hurt my self-esteem.